Hmmm I hear you say… I’ve been looking to bring this notion into the public light. Why would I utter such a bold statement?
I happened to work in an industry where the ratio of women to men is 10:1 (lucky dude I hear you say). I am fortunate, in the sense that it has helped me in a number of ways to understand women and issues that concerns women in society at large. Let me make my assertions below –
Women talk or should I say women can talk! In my office, my ear is constantly ringing about delicious topics such as how well the date went with John over the weekend, fake eyelashes, glutes expansion, brazilian hair or which make-up brand is better suited to different shades and texture of skin types. In fact, I have a product in mind to launch to serve this growing market.
How has it made me a better man? It has in the sense that on occasion where I have been invited to contribute to their discussions, I have to do it from an empathetic standpoint. I cannot be too macho about it or too dismissive, if for example it is an emotional topic such as a relationship that has gone sour or other emotive subjects.
It has allowed me to be respectful towards women (1) because I value their strength and assertiveness (maybe I have a twinkle for a woman with power perhaps) (2) some are go-getters (some have moved from small towns or other restrictive countries and they are now thriving in the big city with a prosperous career which in turn challenges us men to want to continue to flourish as well and to attain more).
How has this knowledge translated or transplanted into my own relationship? Simply, I have learnt to just ‘shut up’. Truly, I have learnt to listen and to be more understanding; and a realisation that men don’t always have the answers. To get the best out of a relationship (and working with women is to work collaboratively), you need to mull over the details and figures, sometimes it can lead to ‘analysis paralysis’ but it is well intended as we must avert risks at all costs.
It has helped me to be a well-rounded individual thus allowing me to broaden my horizons and learn about other topics. For example, I recently encouraged all women in my circle of influence to vote in the UK elections, as I made a point that women were not allowed to vote in the UK until 1918 (1920 in the US, and African-Americans not until 1965).
To conclude, I will state that my masculinity has not been diminished with the rise of feminism rather it has been enhanced by it, as it has allowed me to value my own strength and my own vision. Society will be better served if we sometimes look at issues from a woman’s viewpoint.
I am a father to two boys and I am raising them on this personal motto: To respect a lady is to respect yourself.
Do you have a contrary view? All feedbacks, share, comments are welcome.